5 Ways to Help a Teenage Girl to Grow Self-Esteem

Self-esteem impacts so much of what we do. It influences how we see ourselves, our relationships with others and the decisions we make. For teenage girls navigating friendships, relationships, social media, changing bodies and growing independence, developing a healthy sense of self can be particularly important. We can't grow a girl's self-esteem for her, but the way we respond to her can make a real difference.

Are you an adult that knows or works with teenage girls? Here are five simple things you can do to support her…

1. Listen without judgement

Teenage girls want to feel heard and understood. Our instinct can sometimes be to offer advice or tell them what we think they should do. But when a girl is struggling, she may simply need someone to listen. Try putting your own opinions to one side and listening with an open mind. And remember, silence is okay too. If she doesn't want to share everything, let her take the lead. Building trust takes time.

2. Take an interest in her life

You don't have to love everything a teenage girl loves to still be interested in her. Showing an interest in the things that matter to her can help her feel seen and valued.

Open questions about her interests, friendships and experiences can be helpful here and small moments of genuine interest can make a big difference. Just remember not to turn it into an interrogation. Why not follow her lead and give her space too.

3. Call out the good

When self-esteem is low, girls don't always recognise their own strengths. Sometimes, someone else needs to see them first. Can you notice the things she does well. Perhaps she's kind, creative, determined, funny or thoughtful. Maybe you've noticed a talent that she hasn't recognised in herself yet. Say what you see.

One simple idea is to create a list of skills and character strengths together. You might be surprised by how much there is to celebrate.

4. Encourage new things

Trying something new can feel uncomfortable, but it can also be a great opportunity for growth. Why not encourage her to explore her interests, try something different or have a go at something she has always wanted to do. It doesn't need to be a huge challenge.

Having a go, discovering something you're good at, or simply doing something you didn't think you could do can help self-esteem grow over time.

And why not try something new together? We can't always expect girls to step outside their comfort zones if we're not willing to do it ourselves.

5. Model developing self-esteem yourself

The teenage girls around us are watching how we respond to life, including how we deal with stress, difficult emotions, mistakes and challenges.

So instead of only asking: “How can I help her develop her self-esteem?” perhaps we can also ask: “What am I modelling?”

We don't need to be perfect. Showing girls that we can make mistakes, try again, learn and be kind to ourselves is valuable too. You don't need to be a self-esteem expert to make a difference.

Sometimes it's listening.
Sometimes it's noticing a strength.
Sometimes it's encouraging a girl to try something new.
And sometimes it's simply showing her, through your own example, that self-esteem is something we can all continue to develop.

If she knows you, in any capacity, you have a role to play in helping her flourish.

At Know Your Worth, we believe that self-esteem impacts everything. We support teenage girls to grow their self-esteem and make good decisions, while equipping the adults around them with practical ways to support them too.

Because helping girls know their worth isn't just about what we tell them. It's also about what we model ourselves.